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Congress Considers Pizza Sauce A Vegetable On School Lunch Menus

Greasy pizza

First potatoes, and now pizza. Maybe soon Congress will go ahead and call a hamburger a vegetable. Cows are vegetarians… it all makes sense! Who’s with me?!

Earlier this year, the Obama administration proposed changes to add healthier items to school lunch menus, but Congress doesn’t really care. On Monday night they released their final version of a bill created to change school lunch standards, stating there is no limit on the amoung of potatoes served, no sodium limit and no whole grain requirement. However, the most controversial point on this bill is that tomato sauce counts as a vegetable when tallying nutritional content, essentially turning pizza into a vegetable.

It’s schools that are caught in the middle of this, with conservative members of congress saying the government shouldn’t dictate what children eat. They also believe the requirements proposed by president Obama will cost schools too much money.

Pizza is the most popular lunch time school food, with potatoes at a close second. The idea of Obama’s proposed guidelines would be to cut back on these foods whether kids like them or not, and replace them with foods Congress believes they will hate such as vegetables, beans and whole grains.

Unsurprisingly, there is huge money to be had by processed and frozen food companies who capitalize on children eating garbage food, so they are using their fancy statistics and dollar signs to bump elbows with local congresspeople and get them to see how it benefits the economy.

In the end, it (again, unsurprisingly) all comes down to money. Except they have it backwards. Spend more money on vegetables and you’ll support local farmers as well as keep kids healthier, encouraging them to adapt better eating habits which promotes good health, which promotes a smarter generation and better future for the country and economy. If we don’t want an army full of lethargic sloths who will die by 40 running the U.S. we should probably, you know, quit worrying about how much a 59 cent can of beans is going to affect the national debt.

Image CC licensed by amanda kelso

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